The boy who saved me

[melbender]

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“I guess I just have never had to worry about money before, my parents have a lot of I and they’ve always taken care of us. I just don’t want you to think I live a certain way, mum kept us pretty grounded and happy with less. I don’t want you to worry that I am unhappy or always expecting the bet because I’m not.” I looked over at him “We can give our kids a trust together, and buy a house together. It’s not just on you.”

[melbender]

I pushed away the tears that threatened to spill out. “Infertile? So there’s a big chance we won’t be able to start a family when the time comes.” I but my lip and nodded “I don’t need children to be happy with you, I just need you to be ok.” I smiled, and wrapped my arms around him. “I will be with you every step of the way.”

[Ashwag24]

I sighed and held her. “Baby I got you pregnant before I have faith I can do it again don’t worry we will have our family.” I kissed her head hating that I knew she really wanted this and if I couldn’t give it to her I would hate myself.

[melbender]

Treatment grew near and we were soon about to say goodbye to each other. I had seen the best and worst side of chemo while we done treatment. I was supportive and when alone that’s when I would cry with fear and worry “i love you. I’m going to miss you so much.” He hadn’t been up for sex and I didn’t want to push. “My bags are palcked.”

[Ashwag24]

I nodded not wanting her to go. “Baby come here I want to love on you before you go.” I didn’t really have the energy but I needed to give her something to come back to. Thinking back when we moved into the guest house made me hard within seconds it was so good and I wanted that again and I would use all my energy to give that to her before she left.

[melbender]

“We could just cuddle? If that’s ok with you?” I didn’t want him to exhaust himself or ware himself out. I was so excited to leave terrified to be without him for this long. “I love you so much. We can just cuddle in the couch and watch a movie, maybe make dinner together afterwards?”

[Ashwag24]

I sighed. “I want you now baby!” I did want her I was just tired but I needed to push through that. Taking her hand I placed it over my hard swollen cock. “See baby I want and need you now.”

[melbender]

“Are you sure?” I tightened my grasp on him, stroking through his pants. It made me wet almost immediately. “I’ve missed you.” I said, stroking more and looking into his eyes “take me to bed and love on me for as long as possible”.

[Ashwag24]

I nodded and got up. Taking her with me. As I laid her down in bed I groaned and took her lips with mine. I held her and we undressed slowly never stopping our kisses and taking my sweet time loving her. We took our time and I knew she needed this as much as I did after she came once I flipped and let her set the pace wanting this to last forverever.

[melbender]

I held his face, kissing him with so much passion. I wanted to remember this night before I left. Something to keep me going. “You’re my world.” I whispered, moving slowly with so much love and passion.

[Ashwag24]

I smiled loving her words. “As you are mine baby.” I kissed her back and wanted to thrust up and meet her but I was loosing that strength battle and I hated it.

[melbender]

I felt him softening inside me as he slipped out and I felt so bad. Like I had just forced him into this. I stopped moving, embarrassed that I couldn’t even keep him hard and fought away the tears. “Do you want something to drink? I’m thirsty.” I quietly got up, grabbing my robe and pulling it around my body as I left the room. What was wrong with me!

[Ashwag24]

I felt like shit. I was just so tired. I wanted to run after her but I couldn’t I was drifting off to sleep and I felt bad. I was a terrible boyfriend god I hope she doesn’t think she is the reason cause she isn’t she is so damn sexy.

[melbender]

He was asleep when I came back in. I stared, watching him sleep. "I love you." I whispered, and went back to the small living area. I didn't want him to worry about anything when I was gone, so I just started to cook him different meals and place them in containers for each night I would be away for, I knew mum would cook for him, but it was more so when he wanted to be on his own. I wrote a little note on each, and then went to order Chinese as it grew later.

[Ashwag24]

I groaned, I needed to throw up and I couldn’t move. I groaned louder and I hated this, this was the worse night I shouldn’t have over did it. “Lily!” I moaned hoping she made it in time.

[melbender]

I heard him, and ran in there with a bucket, helping him sit up. I had the wash cloth ready to go also. “I guess you’re not wanting Chinese then.” I tried to make light of it, but felt bad. “Do you want a bath? Or what can I do for you?” I shouldn’t be going tomorrow

[Ashwag24]

I groaned. “No food right now but I want to try to get to the living room to sit with you, I’m so sorry baby I fell asleep and didn’t have the strength.” I sighed more. “Can you ask Tom or someone to help move me.”

[melbender]

I felt useless even more. “Sure. I’ll get them to come down and help.” He always asked for Tom to help. My brother came and soon, the two were on the couch and jealousy was consuming me. I ate dinner in silence. So much for the night I wouldn’t forget. “I’m going to get some sleep. Goodnight.” I bit my lip, and walked into the bedroom closing the door. Curling in bed and tears fell. This wasn’t the day I had hoped for.

Tom looked at Gunnar “Umm is she mad?”

[Ashwag24]

I sighed. “I believe so, I mean I feel so sick all the time and I hate that I can’t give her what she wants and needs right now and I know you don’t want to hear this but fuck we were having a good time but I got so tired that I um well-“. I was embarrassed. “I got soft and she jumped off of me and wouldn’t talk to me and I just dozed.” I sighed. “She is leaving tomorrow and I can’t do shit to make her happy right now.”

[melbender]

“Ahhh.” He drew out slowly. “So she’s wanting the D and you can’t give it to her. Don’t worry, I think she probably thought up some romanctic day you’d spend together and it hasn’t worked out. She knows you’re not well, and she wouldn’t be blaming you. Just Herself more likely.”

[Ashwag24]

I sighed “your fucking right damn, I am a ducking idiot I have to try to get in there with her.” I tried to get up and fell on the couch. “Shit ummm new plan can you get her then leave.”

[melbender]

He laughed “I don’t think you’re up for much other than sleeping.” He grinned as he stood and walked down to find his sister in bed. He could tell she’d been crying. “Hey, I’m heading off. You should go lay on the couch with Gunnar, watch a movie or something and sleep out there. It folds out remember.” He winked.

Why hadn’t I remembered the couch part folded out into a bed. It’s why we wanted it. I groaned, and got up, wiping my face with cold water before going to him. “Is everything ok? Do you need the bucket or something to drink?” I asked going into helping mode

[Ashwag24]

I shook my head. “No I just need to hold you and have you in my arms.” I held them up as good as I could waiting on her to come to me. “I love you I’m sorry for falling asleep and not having the strength to please you right now, it’s not you baby god your sexy don’t think it’s you it’s the damn chemo! I hate it so bad I have no energy baby.”

[melbender]

“I know babe.. I do trust me.” I rested my head against his chest “I guess I just pictured us spending today differently. I shouldn’t have expected it, and I shouldn’t make you feel like you have to have sex to please me. You holding me is enough.” I promised. “Plus, I got extra Chinese so I’m not too mad with you.”

[Ashwag24]

I laughed. “Baby you are amazing. I love you.” I wanted her to have a blast with her dad. “You and your dad are going to have so much fun I know it. And when. You get home I should have more energy.”

[melbender]

“I don’t know if I should go, I mean you’re really unwell and what if something happens like you choke on your own vomit?” I would forever worry. “Could you let Tom stay with you while I’m gone?”

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